Writers block, along with friends and family

Here for the past how ever long its been since the last blog, At least it under 3 weeks. I have had nothing to write about, I've been busy to besides that. Been helping out around the house to a point, and been hanging with a friend and helping him pack a house up. Onto of dealing with drama, and helping with a depression, the same thing i've went through.

 I may have more blogs to come if this writers block passes or if i get horribly sick. So to take up space i am going to post some pictures.

Steven Earl Kraft Jr, yes its that time of year again

The search for Steven Kraft still continues, his Prayer Candle Light Vigil was February 15th, It's been 12 long years with very little answers. It is tough i grew up with him and his cousins and siblings, I am extremely close to a few of his cousin. I am going to post to links below, and if you lived in the area or know anything about it please call the number on the links. I know this i s short but i want to get it to the point.



http://www.wndu.com/home/headlines/Michigan-boy-still-missing-after-12-years-191501311.html  (This is the story with the number)


http://www.wndu.com/video/?autoStart=true&topVideoCatNo=default&clipId=8402029#.UR8SmcHvuYw.facebook  (This is the news video)

Happy valentines day

Yes, i am aware this is the day after, but as i am writing this it actually is valentines day.
 
  Think i was going to be anything special. Especially since i am single, well seeing as i got my neighbor that i like a card i figured i'd invite him up to hang since he works 3rd shift. It went well and i am glad, we hung with another neighbor, later on like within a few hours i texted him, and asked him to be my valentine, as a friend of course( i don't think either of us took it as friends though) he said yes.

  It was a great day for me, i still wish more would have more would have happened between me and my "valentine" but it is what it is. That would be a whole different blog.


Later tonight or tomorrow i will have a blog up about Steven Earl Kraft Jr, and his Prayer Candle Light Vigil

Drama, Drama, Drama

I just need to rant a little bit, and i am going to change the names just because i want to protect their identities.

  You seriously can't trust some people that are suppose to be close to and are able to tell them important. Just as the saying is some woman aren't meant to be mothers, and i never thought i would know i person like that. Well was i wrong, my close friend let call her *L, well she has no stable house or life for a child she has. That at 17/18 yr old has no right mind trying to have a baby if they aren't in a stable home and relationship, married or not married. Now i am really close with this family, and *L defiantly causes trouble for me, my friends *J & *S( not using their names either because of legal matters) and then having a premature baby that may or may not be feed right, changed right or even cared for when crying, at least some what to my experience ( please don't tell me i should do something about it, The law is involved in it all ready) I try my damnedest when i am around him seeing as he is my god son to take care of him which isn't easy when  his mother contradicts everything and experienced parents and babysitter know. That is just frustrating, just all the arguing and running and lying on everyone's part.


 you would think with this being a rant it would be longer, but i can't give much detail with out someone recognizing this, just more fights and drama that i don't want or need.

Almost 2 years later

Its been almost 2 years since i got pregnant the first time, and almost 2 years since i lost that pregnancy. I still think about every day, and i write to them about once or twice every few months. It still hurts, and its really hard to talk about it or tell people that don't already know, especially when trying to start a relationship.

I know i'm not the only one but i afraid to be pregnant again, especially after having a few "possibly pregnant" scares, and that with being smart about what i do. But i'm so afraid that if i do fall pregnant again that i'll just miscarry again. I know this is all over the place, but for me this has been rough I've went through it alone, and pretty much still am.

 Sorry this is so short, but its painful.

Another update: Life Update

Since the last time i updated on here I've had a lot going on, February to May 2012 not a lot happened i fought with my ex boyfriend that was also the father of the babies i lost. June 2012 i thought i had a great thing going on, I started talking to a great guy, then just before my 20th birthday we started to date. Judge me if you want but i drank, and smoked, never got pregnant and didn't try to prevent it, this is stupid of my but after dating 3 months he  asked me to marry him and i said yes, it took him a month but he also asked my father for my hand in marriage. i think it was maybe 2 weeks later, i get a text message from him after not seeing him all weekend saying i got a job and I'm moving, Of course i asked what about me & this next part broke my heart, he told me that he was going to better his life and i should to and maybe one day we can hook up again. that was in November, from that point till now I've been hanging out with a really awesome guy that i have a crush on, and he knows it he has helped me with this break up i was going through. Maybe more to come on that one.

*~Sorry I don't want give out names or a whole lot of detail.

Weightloss update

Well weight loss  has been a slow going process as expected. Haven't been very strict on it either. Not nowhere close to where i want to be but in total i have lost 31 pounds.

Through two pregnancies and miscarriages I am beginning to be happy with my body. In the pink shirt is the most recent like in January of 2013, the others are from the past 2 years. Not much to say with this update just short sweet and to the point.

UPDATE: Steven Kraft still missing, 11 years later

UPDATE: Steven Kraft still missing, 11 years later


Please if you have seen him, or know anything it would mean the world to his friends and family.

Happy Valentines day!

Today has been anything but easy for me, So may of last year i made some stupid choice, was starting birth control. I didn't know i was pregnant till i had lost the baby completely, Middle of June around my birthday i lightly bleed for about a week and a half maybe two weeks and than stopped bleeding, i never thought anything about it, June 25th i went to a birthday party that was for me and my 2 siblings born on or around the same day, i enjoyed myself. That night at my sister place i started having bad cramping but no bleeding, that is the only time pregnancy crossed my mind. I carried on about my business as usual though, But June 30th very late at night technically it was July 1st, I passed the majority of the tissue than and only bleed a few days after, but from what i seen that pregnancy was gone, I was 7 weeks almost 8 weeks, and pretty sure i lost the baby at 6 weeks. Back to why today hasn't been easy for me, well it is because this was my estimated due date, In my mind i believe that angel was a little girl, and i will always think that. She is my angel that is looking over right next to her sister Teagan. Been a painful day but i try to look ahead knowing I'll see her again one day. I know i didn't write very much, but there isn't much to say. 


So Happy Valentines Day! everyone

More old and current weight loss pictures

I'm know where near what weight i want to be, it is slow progress but at least there is progress